Lists

I should start out by saying this isn't a rant against to-do lists. I love them. Every day when I arrive at work, another worker day slave to da man, I like to make myself a to-do list

1. make a to do list
2. confirm to do list
3. review to do list
4. tick off item one
5. confirm ticking off number one

See? There's organisation and achievement right there,

What I am annoyed about today (oh, aside from ridiculously big baby strollers, patchouli and the fact beer isn't tax deductible) is celebrity lists. You know the one where some c or b grader who has a new project is pushed out by their publicist to tell us about their ten favorite things or the objects they have to have. Each weekend magazine has one, with slight tweaks on the same theme and they are all the same.

"oh here's a photo of my family who keep me grounded and here's a picture from childhood and here's some art I got a the markets but i'll pretend i got it form an exotic destination so you think i am both well traveled and rounded and books so you know i read and of course theirs a keepsake and the photo of my partner and if i don't have partner here's my pet to show you my compassion. Also i cook, cooking's popular with the plebeians at the moment isn't it?, and here's my fanciest piece of equipment aside form my microwave but they are so passe. "

They are always the same. Every. Single. Time. Now I will accept the possibility that the typing monkeys (no offense to Typing Monkey tm) at the papers are just getting some happy snaps then rocking out a series of pre written answers with slight variations.

Oh shes an athlete then we better either have books, art or some sort of cultural thing in shot. Do the have a guitar maybe? Model? Better have a shot of her Creusset pan. Politician? Ground them with something fun and informal. Maybe a toy from childhood?

They are always the same. Every. Single. Time. And okay maybe there is a universality among all of us or maybe cause there are so many you don't remember the highlights (Hell I have even done one in a former life. I would like to point out at this point I did lie a little. I didn't own the dog. Feel better after that confession)

No. I have thought about it and they are all boring and so samey samey yawn yawn. A stunning highlight of the beigeness of Australian 'celebrities'. Wheres the interest? The curiosity? The novelty?

I would love to see more with this sort of action

2. Grizzly Bear Hide; Oh i got this when shooting bears in Siberia. My gun jammed and i wrestled with this. Oh we laughed, then me and Putes' (that's what i call Putin) drunk Vodka and bare fist fought. As you do

or even a little some brutal honesty
5. Photo of Family. Well they aren't my family per se but they are a little overweight, and way too western suburban, and would compromise my existing contracts so we got this model family in instead. Nice aren't they.

or the right to the point

8. Shoes Oooooh I love shoes because i am such a vacuous cow that its all about appearance with me. Its where all my money goes, looking fabulous. Charities? I am my own charity and I make people happy by being me so i don't need to give people money do I!